Swap Spotlight: David Kitendaugh

Today's spotlight is meant to highlight the efforts of David James Kitendaugh, the man many argue is the father of the yankee swap.  David, well known for his aversion to the spotlight, declined to be interviewed for this article.  His modesty is in stark contrast to the veritable monster of a party that he has helped to create.  

One of Dave's main roles in the yankee swap is as head chef.  Dave is involved in all aspects of food preparation.  Most of the appetizers that are enjoyed by guests aren't just cooked by Dave, they're actually designed, purchased, prepared and served by Mr. Kitendaugh.  This author occasionally wakes up at night salivating only to realize that dreams of Dave's bacon wrapped water chestnuts have claimed another victim.  Dave was a contributing mind in the creation of last years chicken skewers, and his careful alchemy was behind the rum fortified egg nog.

Dave also dabbles as an interior designer and as such was a critical part of the decoration scheme employed in both yankee swap 2006 and 2005.  His promethean understanding of combustion allowed the real fire that raged last year, but he was also an integral part of the fire committee in 2005.  Dave helped spread the table clothes out in 2006 as well, demonstrating both grace and an eye for symmetry.  

When it comes to gift giving, few can measure up to monsieur Kitendaugh.  Perhaps endowed with the giving spirit by his birth parents, Dave's heart definitely suffers none of the congenital defects that are sure to plague true members of the Kitendaugh gene pool.  Dave's gift in 2005, a Twister Game set, is the kind of present most people dream of giving, inspiring both camaraderie between players and physical fitness.  His 2006 gift was above and beyond.  Dave gave a customized T-shirt with a picture of JC himself.  I personally tried the shirt on before he gave it and couldn't for the life of me wipe the smile off of my face.

David Kitendaugh is a yankee swap soldier.   He's a yankee swap commander.  He's a yankee swap God.  Without Dave, the yankee swap would be little more than a secret santa, something that gives me goose bumps just to think about.  Without him we would surely be wandering around in the dark.  If you see Dave at the yankee swap, don't thank him (though he deserves it).  Just make sure that you offer him a friendly smile as you open your present.  Without him, you'd probably be sitting at home.  Like a loser.  Like Brad.